77: Reasoning

The forecast is for rain, but the forecast is always wrong (at least whenever I seem to notice it). I notice it now; therefore, it won’t rain. However, I didn’t bring my umbrella today, and when the forecast is for rain and I don’t bring my umbrella, it rains; therefore, I’m wrong; it will rain. In fact, the air smells like rain; it has that fresh, almost metalic odor. I can feel rain in the corn on my big toe, and my corn is never wrong. Corns in general are never wrong; corns are more reliable than weather forecasts, although they are more difficult to interpret. However, the fact that the forecast is for rain makes me doubt my nose and this interpretation of my corn. Once I went to the beach without my umbrella. Naturally, it rained and I got all wet. Ever since then I have taken my umbrella to the beach and now it never rains when I’m there. Unfortunately, today, I’m not there. Sometimes I smell rain but it’s only the neighbor washing his car. And who knows maybe I knocked my corn and didn’t notice it at the time, and the knock makes my corn feel like rain. Ipso facto; quid pro quo. That’s logic for you— utterly useless when applied to human behavior and the weather.

Bolt