Impossible objects
About this book
Aladdin’s lamp
– The story’s not about the lamp.
The real magic
– The real magic is in hopes and dreams.
Flying carpet
– It wouldn’t be the same without the magic.
An instrument
– Physics should be an instrument, not an impediment.
Santa’s sleigh
– Maybe it’s doubted less because it’s so outlandish.
White lie
– Is a white lie a sin?
Noah’s ark
– It defies reason.
Explanations
– It’s a religious allegory.
Seal of Soloman
– Could the ring have given him power?
Stone tape
– An object has no memory.
Holy grail
– The Lord’s grace is in it.
Numismatic charms
– The charms are impossible; not the coins.
Philosophers’ stone
– Alchemy was a conspiracy theory for intellectuals.
Philosophers
– The theory had a flawed heritage.
Treasures of Britain
– Celtic tales featured marvelous treasures.
Sword in the stone
– The sword is a myth.
Excalibur
– Arthur’s sword had to be enchanted.
Horn of Brân Galed
– Whatever drink one wished was always in it.
Cauldron of Dyrnwch the Giant
– The cauldron boiled meat only for a brave man.
Dyrnwyn (White-Hilt)
– The sword blazed with fire only for a brave man.
Chariot of Morgan Mwynfawr
– This chariot took Morgan quickly wherever he wished.
Merlin’s staff
– The staff, like Merlin, is a myth.
Powers of the staff
– Merlin’s staff is his key to mystical knowledge.
Crown of immortality
– I’d approve if it were only symbolic.
Fountain of youth
– No seeker has found anything but his own foolishness.
Naglfar
– Mordes of monsters will sail Naglfar to battle.
Han Feizi’s spear and shield
– A self-contradictory notion should disintegrate.
Icarus
– I understand it as a moral lesson.
Angel wings
– They don’t need big white wings.
Witch’s broomstick
– Witches and warlocks don’t eat bugs.
Perversion of nature
– The perversion is not in the dildo.
Flying Dutchman
– Perils of the seas produce fears and phantoms.
Pushpa Vimana
– Flying palaces or chariots were ready.
Magic wand
– To make magic, use a magic wand.
Seer stones
– A stone was not the source of any revelation.
Crystal skulls
– Crystal skulls can’t cure cancer.
Perpetual motion machine
– A perpetual motion machine is impossible.
Koschei’s needle
– Immortality is also impossible.
Shirikodama
– Watch out for kappa who steal your shirikodama.
Gleipnir
– The Norse dwarves made a chain to bind Fenrir until doomsday.
Liahona
– A good con has creative details.
Tower of Babel
– Nonesense.
Māui’s fishhook
– Māui was a trickster.
Maleperduis
– This castle is the archetype of the foolproof refuge.
Canals on Mars
– It would be wonderful but it’s not true.
Planet X
– Percival Lowell believed in Planet X.
Book of Thoth
– Many books that claim to be written by Thoth.
Peter Stumpp’s belt
– You’re not likely to ever see it.
Norse chariots
– What’s more believable, tame housecatsor flying goats?
Perkins’ metallic tractors
– Their cures were examples of the placebo effect.
Anti-gravitational boots
– Anti-gravity is not out of the question.
Id, ego, superego
– They are like shapes in the clouds.
Warp drive
– Warp drives exploit an exception to the Theory of Relativity.
Time machine
– It’s only a creative fantasy.
Neuralyzer
– Shock is a neuralyzer.
Hidden portal
– It may be a gate to another time and place.
Gates of Alexander
– Alexander build a wall to protect us.
Carl Sagan’s dragon
– He described an invisible dragon.
Psionics
– You can’t detect it because it doesn’t broadcast.
Unicorn horn
– Nobody has ever seen the animal.
Magic bean
– It will test you to an extreme.