They say, with respect to our dreams, if we try to ignore them, they only get worse. I think that’s hogwash. Are all our sins mapped out for us the moment we’re born? Are we all exactly a random arrangement of our parents’ neuroses? What does it say about a person if he’s totally different from his parents, or totally the same? I can’t answer these questions. The cup I use to measure water is already mostly full, or partly empty. The cup I use to measure the water in the cup has another unmeasurable amount of water in it.
After a while, you get used to dreams of falling. You know you’ll wake up just before you hit bottom. Sometimes there’s no bottom, and it’s almost like flying, only with less ambition. You think as you fall, “I might as well wake up. This is going nowhere.” Then you wake up.
You can’t control your dreams, but you can influence how you feel about them. You can ignore them; that’s one way to go. You can obsess about them; that’s another way. Me, I’m just curious; I want to understand. This is myself, when dreaming. Nobody else. It’s evidence of the things that made me, and it’s the basis for everything else, everything other than how I got to be this way.
I don’t have a fear of falling. I’ve accepted it.
Monologues