Being more secret than the location of the Holy Grail, an unnamed consortium gathers annually using encrypted phone systems to share customer service techniques using automated phone systems and internet forms and bots. The goal is to spend as little as possible without appearing to overtly ignore customer problems or reject customer claims. Studies of how customer dissatisfaction relates to artificial bureaucratic layers and departmental silos are sent in advance. Automatic language translation is available to the consortium members. Each member’s identity is concealed and company names are kept secret. Customized reports are sent out two months after each meeting to help members reduce costs and improve customer satisfaction.
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